College and Career Center
Mrs. Denise Yamamoto
There is a sense of excitement on campus for seniors as they get ready to submit their college applications. With a Dec. 1 (or earlier) deadline looming, seniors should have an idea of what they will be doing next fall. Some students are eagerly researching colleges and submitting applications, while others will procrastinate and wait until the last minute. Wherever the senior is in the process, there is a feeling of apprehension and worry that accompanies it. The College Advisor, Inc. has useful information on combating this anxiety.
Application Anxiety
It’s that time of year. Application deadlines are approaching and many students are rushing to polish their essays. (That’s assuming they have essays to polish.) Even diligent students who normally finish their English papers weeks in advance can find themselves procrastinating when it comes to college applications.
Some students haven’t even decided where they want to apply.
For some, the pressure is too much, the stakes too high and they just want to avoid the whole topic. Others figure they’ve got plenty of time during Fall or Thanksgiving Break. Without the distraction of school, they plan to immerse themselves in college applications.
There’s often a more subtle psychological reason for the avoidance.
Completing applications sets into motion a series of events that can bring rejection, which is painful, or acceptance, which means leaving home, also painful. Going to college means growing up, leaving the comfort and safety of family and friends and taking responsibility for your life. When you think about it, it’s amazing that kids actually do the applications at all.
Ambivalence isn’t limited to students.
The prospect of sending a child off to college can evoke mixed emotions in parents. Kids who have spent years saying they can’t wait to get away from home may be frightened and unsure when it starts to look like reality. And parents who’ve been dreaming of a quiet house and no more fights over curfews and messy rooms may feel conflicted about letting go.
The stress of college applications can put everyone on edge. Students may see a parent’s attempt to be helpful as pushing and pressuring. Parents can feel helpless and exasperated as they watch a child struggle.
For a parent, it can be difficult not to step in and fix everything, but that will only make a child feel less competent. Once they get to college, the parent won’t be there to remind him to do his homework and go to bed at a reasonable hour. Being responsible for their college applications helps a student feel more prepared to manage their life.
There’s another reason to let students take charge of the application process.
If parents handle all the communication with prospective schools, admissions officers may start to wonder whether the student is ready for college. Students are encouraged to make the phone calls, arrange visits and follow up with questions, which helps him feel invested in the process; it also conveys to colleges a sense of his maturity and purpose.
For students who feel overwhelmed with everything they have to get done, the best thing parents can do is help them get organized. Sit down together and make a chart listing the colleges the student is applying to, with requirements (test scores, transcripts, essays, recommendation letters) and application deadlines, so that he or she can check off each task as it’s completed.
Sometimes, however, it does make sense to seek help. A counselor may be able to provide perspective and serve as a buffer between parents and children. Students often feel more comfortable having a stranger read their personal essay than their parents. A neutral third party can help a student stay on track where a parent’s reminders would be written off as nagging.
For now, the best you can do is get support through this stressful time.
In the end, the applications will get done, and there will be a wonderful, if fleeting, feeling of relief that the whole thing is out of your hands. See Mrs. Yamamoto in C&CC if you have any questions or challenges in your college research and application process. Good luck!
Important Upcoming Dates
October 15, Saturday – 7:45 am PSAT
October 20, Thursday – 6:00 pm Military Academy & ROTC Scholarship Night
Info session at Aiea High School
November 3, Thursday – 2:00 pm University of California – Application & Personal Statement Informational Session
November 4, Friday – 5:00 pm College and Career Fair at Neal Blaisdell Center
November 16, Wednesday – 1:00 pm ASVAB
